Finding Balance

Finding balance between my spiritual life, love of training, eating well, spending time with friends, my relationship with Matt, our home and work (now physical therapy) has been a constant struggle my entire life.
As I continue to get stronger in my rehab that underlying issue has been brought back to life. A positive sign for sure that I am healing. And, there are still consequences to being out of balance. The lesson once again is when I forget to step back and assess the whole; the "over doing it" part of me completely takes over.
Point in case: last week I attended physical therapy five days in a row. Therapy has been permanently upped to 4x week to make sure all the body parts that need assistance get worked. In addition, I swam three times with the longest one being a 1000 meters of alternating 200 yards kick with 200 yards swim. I even swam a straight 100 freestyle with flip turns. Yippee!!!!!! I can tell my swimming self has returned. Muscle memory is amazing-that's my friend these days.
Over the past two weeks, I've met with 4 orthopedic surgeons about my acl tear and patella femural arthritis. The Boulder doctor recommended I hold off on surgery for 3 months to give my body more time to heal. What great advise! How did he know that's exactly what I need to do?,
Other highlights include surprising myself by being able to comfortable mediate with a group of friends for 40 minutes while sitting on a comfy couch with big pillows, of course! Afterwards, Matt and I celebrated with Linda (amazing blogger Linda) and her partner, Jack my being in recovery. The evening began with perfectly chilled champagne followed by homemade appetizers, pasta, salad and tiramisu. I feel so fortunate to be so loved.
The following day, two very dear friends from Kentucky, my home state stopped by for a visit before heading to Breckenridge to ski, sled and snowmobile. I topped off that evening by driving myself for the first time in the dark to study group. Needless to say, by the time Sunday morning rolled around I was spent. Even still, it was not until after walking to the recreation center, riding the recumbent bike for 35 minutes then walking home that I knew I had over done it.

Clearly, trauma takes its toll on a deep, deep level and finding balance is still a challenge for me. I am trying not to be hard on myself, yet at the same time I need to learn the lesson. I've spent today taking it easy. After PT, I watched a documentary on stress hormones with Lasey, our 20 lb tabby cat that follows me everywhere now. I also opted to nap for several hours instead of working on 4th quarter payroll discrepancies.

I suspect tomorrow will be more of the same until I climb back out of this hole.